Conservative Parents Explain Why They Are Boycotting Disney

“I don’t show my kids Disney so they can be indoctrinated by liberals. I do it so I have time to cheat on my husband.”

“The angry man on the TV said this is what I was supposed to be angry about this week.”

“They have gay characters in their movies. What’s next? Some scenario where Hercules and Prince Eric maybe meet, and Hercules rescues him from danger, and as Hercules holds him in his arms, Prince Eric suddenly becomes aware of Hercules’ sinewy, muscled frame, and as he sets him down their fingers brush, and then he looks up into his azure eyes, and…”

“I lost the remote.”

“When they rewrote Goofy’s backstory to remove his long history of violent pro-life activism, I was done.”

“For years, the only gay Disney characters were Smee from Peter Pan, Doc from Snow White, Scar from Lion King, the Cheshire Cat, Pluto, Ursula, Baloo, all 101 Dalmations, Mickey Mouse, Minnie Mouse, Winnie the Pooh, and Christopher Robin, and that was enough.”

“I can let my kids be groomed by pedophiles for free at church.”

“They’re fascists trying to control what we think. I expected better from a company founded by Nazis.”

“Back in my day, Disney was just a mouse piloting a riverboat, which was fine, but now that I think about it, it was probably a boat filled with pedophiles.”

“I liked it when Disney told happy, normal stories where certain kinds of people simply didn’t exist.”

“I just preferred when they weren’t afraid to be openly racist.”

“I’m worried all this ‘acceptance’ could lead to my kids accepting themselves, and that’s simply not how I was raised.”

“It should be left up to the parents if and when their child sees a mouse wearing pants.”

“I’ve endured Frozen 157 times, and hearing my daughters scream “Let It Go” has left me a hollow shell of a person. I’m just grateful Disney finally gave my husband a reason to pull the plug.”

“Turning Red turned out to be a whole story about menstruation. Do you really think I want to explain all that to my 12-year-old daughter?”

“It’s sad, but somewhere along the way Disney stopped reinforcing every prejudice I have.”

“I don’t care about the woke shows. I just want the kid to stop watching the movies over and over again.”

“Fox News is an equally affordable babysitter.”

“Political expedience.”