Hunter Biden, the son of sitting President Joe Biden, is expected to plead guilty to two federal misdemeanor counts of failing to pay upwards of $100,000 in income taxes in 2017 and 2018. The Onion asked Americans how they felt about Biden opting to take a plea agreement, and this is what they said.
“Having an embarrassing son just makes me relate to Joe Biden even more.”
“Well, well, well, it turns out .0004% of what I’ve been saying about him was right all along.”
“I’m sorry, but you said the bad name and now I have to angry cry.”
“But I wanted to bitch and moan about this for another six to eight months!”
“Shame on the parents for not teaching their son the right way to avoid paying taxes.”
“Can I be outraged about his unpaid taxes and still want to abolish the IRS?”
“Only CEOs should be exempt from paying income taxes.”
“I knew he was guilty, which is why it’s so not fair that he gets to plead guilty.”
“I knew it! My investigations on Reddit finally did him in.”
“Hopefully this doesn’t ruin his bright future as a lobbyist.”
“Well, I certainly won’t be voting for him in 2024.”
“He should have been found even more guilty.”
“Let’s drum up some accusations about Ella Emhoff next. I’m not a fan of her whole vibe.”
“I’m just pissed his dad said he loves him.”
“He may be the first wealthy person to not pay their taxes, but this cushy sentence ensures he won’t be the last.”
“Who?”
“Do you have any coke?”